Being a mum is hard. Especially being a single mum. I’m not a single mum obviously but a lot of the time it is just me and Kory together as my partner works a lot of hours. We wouldn’t have what we have if it wasn’t for him.
I always knew I wanted to be a mum one day but when I first became one, it was scary! Everything was new and I didn’t know what to expect. Kory is nearly 2 years old and in that time, I haven’t had a lot of help from others, my mum works herself and there’s no one else I can really ask for help.
So on those days when i’ve been exhausted because I didn’t have any sleep the night before, those days when Kory has really tested me or those days when we’ve both been sick at the same time, i’ve had no choice but to push through and carry on. I’ve made sacrifices which as parents we do. I don’t go out every weekend, my idea of fun is having a laugh with Kory, I always put my son first and I haven’t been able to go back to work yet because there’s no-one to have Kory for me and childcare fees are so expensive but i’ve accepted that there’s time for all of those things and that my time will come. I’ve taught Kory everything he knows, he’s no angel and he knows exactly how to push my buttons but he’s happy, he’s funny, he’s so sweet and he’s made me the proudest mum on the planet. Obviously the credit isn’t all mine, he’s got an amazing daddy too! But for all those people who have an opinion of me or those who doubted us and tried to tell us we were too young or we should do such and such a thing first before becoming parents, look where we are now.
For the first time in my life, i’m actually proud of my self. I’m proud of the mum i’ve become. I’ve learnt to let other people’s opinions roll off my shoulders, i’ve accepted myself, i’ve learnt to say ‘fuck it’ more often, the housework can wait, if i screw up – it’s not the end of the world, I am getting better at putting myself first which is something I struggled with a lot when I first became a mum. I never took the time for myself because I felt like I couldn’t or shouldn’t but most importantly i’m proud of the mum i’ve become because i’ve raised an incredible little human being.
No one else can take credit for that.
As a mum I have grown, i’ve learned things and I am still learning every day. My house is not spotless or picture perfect, I don’t make healthy home cooked meals for my child every single day, I don’t always plan fun, educational activities for us to do together and I’ve accepted that. I have found my own parenting style that I’m comfortable with and what works for me and my child. Beating myself up over the mistakes I’ve made won’t help but learning from them and moving on from them will.
I’m proud of the mum I’ve become because it’s been a heck of a journey to become her.