As a stay at home mum, I feel privileged that I am able to stay home and raise my child but sometimes being a stay at home mum also makes me feel like a bit of a failure.
As a stay at home mum, sometimes I feel like all I do is be a mum, my only achievement is being a mum, all I have to show for myself is being a mum and all that I am is just a mum. I do the same thing day in and day out, to most people taking care of your child, looking after your family and your home are not things worthy enough to be called achievements, I’ve been a stay at home mum for so long now that I don’t have anything else to show for myself, everything about me, everything I do and am revolves around my child and sometimes that makes me feel like a failure.
Do any of you ever feel this way?
Well if you do, I just want you to know that you are NOT a failure. As a stay at home mum myself, I know exactly how you feel. I’ve thought the same thoughts as you and I’ve felt the same way. I know what it’s like to be trapped in your own mind and to believe that you’re worthless because you’re just a mum. Other people or even yourself may not realise or believe this but what we do as mums is the most hardest and most rewarding job in the world, to some what we do may not seem like that much of a big deal but it is. We spend every waking minute taking care of our kids, learning them new things, loving and nurturing them and playing with them and it’s because of this that everything our kids know and have learned is because we have taught them. Our kids are polite, funny, clever and caring because of us. That is what we as mums have to show for ourselves and that is something to be proud of. To outsiders it might seem silly for me to class being a mum an achievement of mine but for me, being a mum is my greatest achievement and it’s what I’m most proud of in my life. Yes I would love a career. Doing what exactly? I’m not quite sure. I feel like the only thing I know how to do is look after my child and I even question my ability at doing that sometimes! But right now, I’m happy with being a full time stay at home mum.
On a bad day when I’m feeling down and in the dumps about the way my life is, I make myself feel better by telling myself that yes a career and all that other stuff would be amazing but all that stuff can wait. That can all be put on pause. But being a mum can’t and everything that we do as mums is so important. When our kids have grown up and left us and have lives of their own, we’ll have all the time in the world to do all of that stuff that we wanted to do and only then will we realise that when we thought we was ‘just’ being stay at home mums, that was the most important thing we’ll probably ever accomplish in our lives. Looking after our family and raising decent human beings is what truly matters above anything else. When we’re old and gray are kids at what we will look back at and be most proud of, not a job. None of that other stuff will even matter so why worry so much about it now!
Just remember that you are not a failure. From one stay at home mum to another.