When you’re a parent, there will be good days and bad days. Fact. Days when you have to shout more than you’d like to, days that make you question yourself as a parent and days that leave you feeling like utter crap. But in saying that, there’s also those days that you don’t want to end, days when you’ve genuinely had fun with the kids and days when you go to bed feeling like a rockstar. For me, realising this made it a lot easier for me to accept that not every day is going to run smoothly or even be enjoyable and that that’s okay, and in doing so, I allowed myself to cut me some slack.
For instance, yesterday was a bad day but today has been a good day. Not every day can be a good day, I wish it could but it just can’t, can it? Otherwise we wouldn’t have ‘good days’ would we, without bad days to shine light on the good we’d just have… days, I suppose? When we’ve had what I would refer to as a ‘bad day,’ it’s usually a day when I’ve had to lose my sh!t with the threenager to get him to listen or like yesterday, a day when out of nowhere he just decided to throw the tantrum of all tantrums. A day when even though I did nothing wrong (I wasn’t the one throwing a giant wobbler for no reason!) I end the day going to bed feeling miserable and guilty.
Not fun.
And to be honest, I’d had enough of feeling that way. I’ve always been really tough on myself when it comes to parenting right from day one, always doubting myself over the slightest of things and I can admit that but it was starting to make me feel exhausted. Both physically and mentally. I’d had enough of crying to myself in bed at the end of every sh!t day.
God, I sound pathetic.
So last night I didn’t do that. Instead I had a takeaway, watched a movie and drank some fruit cider. Friday night is usually mine and Kory’s takeaway night but because he’d been a turd yesterday I made him his tea and once he’d gone to bed I ordered a takeaway but for myself. I’m not gonna lie, I did start to feel guilty when I was eating my cheesy chips (Kory’s favourite) but then I got the urge to slap myself and reminded myself that having a takeaway was a treat. One that yesterday, he didn’t deserve.
Being a parent is tough, it is without a doubt the hardest thing I have ever done but I can’t keep giving myself a hard time. I just have to keep reminding myself, there will be good days and bad days. I don’t know what tomorrow has in store for us, we can only see but one thing is for sure, I won’t be punishing myself at the end of the day.
Just remember that at the end of every day no matter how sh!t it’s been there is always a new day tomorrow… I can’t promise you that it will be a good one but it’s a new day nevertheless and there will always be tomorrow.