honest parenting, mom blog, mom blogger, mom problems, motherhood, motherhood struggles, mum blog, mum blogger, mum problems, parenting, parenting blog, parenting blogger, parenting problems, stay at home mom, stay at home mum

My hands may be full but my heart is fuller

This little one doesn’t want me to put her down today but at least it’s Saturday and we don’t have to rush out of the house to be anywhere, it’s okay that there’s still pots to be washed and it’s perfectly acceptable that Kory is still wearing the same pyjamas he went to bed in the night before.

Because I realised something today.

I realised the house work can wait.

Everything can wait.

I’ve always liked to keep a nice, clean and tidy house. In fact, I like to keep everything in my life neat and organised. I’m known for being quite a particular person.

When I was pregnant with Kory, people would always tell me ‘you’ll have to get used to mess once the baby arrives’ but that wasn’t the case for me. Without sounding like I’m blowing my own trumpet, after Kory was born I somehow still managed to stay on the ball with everything. I still managed to keep on top of the house work and keep my home looking nice. There’s been times when I’ve found it difficult to do so don’t get me wrong, like when Kory dropped his naps during the day and started to sleep only at bedtime but I still caught up and got done what I needed to get done. Even if it meant waiting until he had gone to bed before I could make a start on the house work.

But since having Kora as well as Kory to look after, I’ve found it really hard to find the time for house work or the time to do anything in fact! I have every intention of getting through my to do list for the day but I’m busy looking after both kids and running a house that I feel as though I blink and the day is over with before I even know it and once they’ve both finally gone to bed I’m way too tired to be cleaning the house.

But you know what? It can all wait.

I don’t want to lose my patience with Kory because there are dishes in the sink or because I haven’t managed to hoover yet. I don’t want to put Kora down as soon as she’s been fed, changed and fallen asleep. I want to cuddle her.

It was much easier to keep up with the house work when it was just Kory I had to take care of because he goes to nursery 3 days a week and when he’s home he likes to play in his bedroom which means I had a lot more free time to get stuff done. I think one of the things I have found the hardest since becoming a mum of two is accepting that I may not be able to get as much done as I used to be able to and to not punish myself for that.

What could be more important than playing with your child and cuddling your baby? Nothing. Because even when I think I’m doing ‘nothing,’ playing and cuddling is doing something and it’s a lot more important than those pots that need washing.

Kory is now 3 years old and the time I have had with him has already gone by so fast and I want to treasure my time with both of my children. He isn’t going to be my little boy forever and Kora isn’t always going to be this small. One day when they’re both grown up and they don’t want to play with mummy anymore, I’ll feel sad and I’ll have all the time in the world to tidy the house.

When Kory and Kora look back on their childhoods, I don’t want them to remember a mum that never had the time for them, a mum that would always brush them off because she prided herself more on what her house looked like. I want them to remember a mum that made them laugh and smile and actually spent time with them.

I want them to remember all the mess we made and all the fun we had making it together.

honest parenting, mom blog, mom blogger, mom problems, motherhood, motherhood struggles, mum blog, mum blogger, mum problems, parenting, parenting blog, parenting blogger, parenting problems, stay at home mom, stay at home mum

Catching up

I know it’s been a while since I last posted anything and I am sorry about this. A lot has happened since I was last here so I thought I’d better give you all an update.

First things first, baby K was born! Our beautiful daughter made her entrance on her due date after months of worry and us anticipating her arrival after quite a few scares and being told I was ‘high risk’ throughout the pregnancy and was most likely going to have another prem baby. Despite this she proved us all wrong, including me who was also expecting her to join us sooner and she was born at exactly 40 weeks on the 13th of September weighing 6lb 3oz at 5:47pm after a very quick delivery. There will be a blog post solely sharing her birth story with you all very soon (I promise!)

We named her Kora Robyn Lonsdale.

So I’m guessing some of you may be wondering where I’ve been but the truth is I haven’t been anywhere, in fact I haven’t even been through the door!

1. Because it takes forever to get two kids out of the house!

2. I actually feel a little overwhelmed when I think about taking them out.

Since having Kora, i’m finding life with two kids a little crazy to say the least and I’m still trying to find my feet as a new mum of 2. Everyone told me when I was pregnant with Kora that it would be hard at first juggling two kids and I sort of just agreed but it really is. It’s a lot harder than I ever imagined. Kory is a wonderful big brother and Kora is a dream, she’s honestly such a good baby but usually when I’m feeding Kora, Kory will want me for something or when i’m playing with Kory, Kora will wake and I just feel like I don’t have enough hands! I literally feel like I need to split myself in two sometimes. For 3 years Kory has had me all to himself and we have spent so much time together just the two of us that I think we’re both finding it difficult now that all that has changed and with this comes a great deal of guilt on my part and I often feel quite overwhelmed by this. Obviously things have changed for the better, giving Kory a little sister and seeing him with her is the best feeling ever but it’s still been a massive adjustment.

I’m sure I will get into the swing of things soon and establish some sort of routine in time but for now, i’m just winging this whole thing and hoping for the best…

I hope I can get back to blogging more regularly too, blogging for me has been a great way for me to talk about how i’m feeling and for me to share with you all what I’m going through at that particular time in my life. I think it’s safe to say that since having my baby my emotions have been all over the place as I’m sure many of you will have experienced yourselves after having children. I mean just the other day I cried because my bump had gone and I was no longer pregnant! What was I expecting to happen?! It’s silly I know but it still makes me a little sad when I think about it. So not only would I like to get back to blogging again because it’s something I enjoy doing but because I think it would really help me right now.

So that’s you all caught up with what’s been going on in my life! I have lots of different posts that I have planned to write and share with you all so don’t go anywhere, please stick around and bare with me. I’m new to this parenting two children malarkey!

Thanks for reading and I promise that I won’t leave it as long next time.